Cup Five

Person: David Murray

drink: small Pluot Green Tea from Caribou Coffee

I knew David Murray from the periphery. I had been in the same room with him on a handful of occasions and followed him on Twitter. I’d heard people mention his name and possibly introduced myself at some point, but we had never really met. I attended an event he co-chaired in Detroit that brought together a variety of innovative people to talk technology and reenergize Detroit. Inspired by his efforts to build a better community, I decided to what time to sit down and officially meet. I was going to be near Detroit for a day, so we set up a meeting.

By one o’clock in the afternoon the day of our meeting, I had already had more coffee than a girl needs in one day and David doesn’t drink much coffee so we both opted for iced tea. This means we technically did not have a cup of coffee, but we were in a coffee shop and I’m making the rules here, so it still counts.

The two weeks before our meeting, I’d been mulling over the idea of passion. What am I passionate about? How do I create a career around that passion? These are the two toughest questions I’ve had to answer since I’ve been in college—harder than all the awful final exams I spent countless hours studying for over the past three years—combined. I’ve had professors explain how to use a Tukey Test to calculate the mean for statistical research and say “where is the record store?” in Spanish, but I haven’t come across Major Life Decision Making 101.   

I decided to ask David because I knew he understands passion. He voluntarily devotes his time and energy to starting projects in Detroit. Not, I-think-I’ll-rebuild-the-engine-on-my-old-Chevy projects, but rather, Lets-attract-people-from-across-Michigan-to-a-two-day-conference-on-innovation-and-technology-AND-bring-in-big-name-speakers-while-we’re-at-it projects. Projects of that magnitude require huge amounts of passion, which meant David likely had an insight or two about the topic.

I found out he had more than just an insight or two. Throughout our conversation, he offered one piece of advice after another—and in such a straightforward way. In the middle of a response or story he would stop, hit the table as if he was making a bullet point, and say, “Here’s something to takeaway.” Then he would explain a concept or habit that had greatly helped him. Almost like a thoughtful professor pointing out the points in the lecture that will be on the test. I took mental notes—the test of life is one I’d like to pass.

Here are a few of those points translated into my own words. 

Point 1: When it comes to job searching, here’s the deal: your resume is not important. Okay, it’s important—but it’s really not important. What you learned in college: it’s important, but really not that important. You can’t let those things define you and the success of your career. Decide what you want to do and go do it. Pick up a book and learn something, ignore the fear stopping you, be willing to try something new—those skills will take you farther than a good GPA. And along the way, pick up “badges.” Think Foursquare or Girl Scouts. Speaking at a conference is a badge. Organizing a 5k fundraiser is a badge. Completing a research project at your internship is a badge. Failing—if you learn from the experience—can be a badge too. Then use those badges to show people what you’re capable of doing.

Point 2: Build a foundation. David talks a lot about working to help the greater good. He said he has always tried to make the place he was living better, which leads to the second take away—decide on you principles to live by. Then let those principles be the foundation for your life—just as cement is the foundation for a house. A contractor wouldn’t start building the first floor without a foundation firmly in place, and David helped me realize I shouldn’t build a career without first knowing my core principles.

Once you’ve got the foundation, you build life experiences on top of it. My first job in the “real world” will be the first floor of my house and as I advance through life I can build upon the previous levels. At one point, I might decide I’m not happy with a level or addition I’ve built. That’s fine, I can renovate or demolish and rebuild—but the foundation won’t change. It is always there providing support and direction for my life.

Point 3: The final point I’ll share is one I’ve believed for a long time. David said 90% of happiness is surrounding yourself with the right people. David can thrive because the people in his life—from his wife and family to his coworkers and friends—inspire him, support him, and love him. That’s 90% of the battle. The remaining 10% is making enough money to put food on the table and a roof over your head with enough left over to buy the things you need. Combine that with a career based on solid principles that align with your passion and contribute to the greater good and you’ll be alright in life.

If the course Major Life Decision Making 101 did exist, the hour I spent with David would have made for a great lecture. I realized that it’s not about what you do but how you do it that really matters. Our conversation wasn’t about how to find a job, it was about how to live your life. As I begin my post-college job search, I’m going to focus less on job descriptions and company profiles. Instead, I’m going to focus my attention inward. What are the core principles in my life? What do I love to do? How can I contribute to the world? Then find a job that aligns with those answer. I’m going to build the foundation before the house.

Our conversation also helped me see the job search within a context of the bigger picture. When David receives praise and attention for his efforts, he is quick to point out and praise others that are working equally hard to making a difference. He’s not in it for fame and attention—he’s in it for the community and the greater good. That’s a powerful characteristic to have and one that resonated with me.

The job search easily becomes about a quest for I. Where can I get the most money, where can I get the best benefits, where can I shine. The job market is tough—you have to be looking of for yourself—but David showed me the power of turning that mindset around. Yes, it is my job, my career, my life, but instead of searching for the job that creates the biggest impact on me, why not find a job where I can have an impact on others—where I can contribute to the greater good.

I greatly appreciate the cup of coffee iced tea I had with David. It looks like I have some homework to do between now and graduation.

Direct Message via Twitter

me:

Hi Dave, I’m working on a project http://www.52cups.tumblr.com. I had a great time at FMW10—would you be free to do coffee this Friday?

DaveMurr:

Hello. Thanks for making it out to FMW10, Friday is kind of up in the air. Are you in Lansing? I’m in Troy so maybe phone call?

me:

I’m actually headed to Troy for the day.

DaveMurr:

Ah, well then if you are headed this way, I certainly can make myself available. Got to jump into a meeting, but think of a time, and place?

Cup Four: David Murray

Friday, August 13th / Caribou Coffee of Crooks and Big Beaver Rd / 2:00 PM

Cup Four

Person: Laurie Lonsdorf

drink: medium brewed coffee from Grand River Coffee and Chocolate (Tanzanian blend)

It started with a tweet. Laurie Lonsdorf, a former Michigander turned Washingtonian, announced she was moving back to Lansing. Weeks before the move, Laurie decided to get a head start on meeting people and started connecting with Lansing residents over Twitter. That is how we originally met. We started talking and I learned that her profile picture, which depicts her wearing a tiara, and her Twitter screen name, @Princesslons, corresponded with her business moniker, the Princess of Persuasion. In Seattle, Laurie worked as a Self-Employed Marketing Copywriter and Communications Strategist and picked up the princess guise to become memorable and attract her clientele.

Marketing is my major and entrepreneurship is what I love so I was interested in hearing her story and she was interesting in getting to know another new face, which meant she was a perfect pick for cup number four. I picked a coffee shop downtown and when Laurie walked in, I immediately recognized her from her profile picture. We ordered our coffees—she had an iced brewed coffee, I ordered a regular—and found a spot on the oversized leather couches near the big windows overlooking the activity of downtown. It didn’t take me long to ask the question she’s been getting a lot lately, “Why did you move back to Michigan?”

After graduating from high school in East Lansing, Laurie left for college in Colorado and eventually ended up in Seattle where she’s been for the past 20 years. While she liked the city, she realized it was time for a change. A good friend from high school was considering moving back to Lansing and convinced Laurie to join her. She still had friends in the area and found the entrepreneurial feel and great hospitality of the community appealing, so she decided she would relocate her life back to Lansing.

I was fascinated with her role as the Princess of Persuasion so I asked what steps she took to get there: did she get a Masters Degree? Where did she find her clients? How did she handle the highs and lows of self-employment? Her answers—

No, she didn’t have a Master’s Degree, “But by now I should have a Ph.D. from the school of Hard Knocks.” Laurie picked up books and taught herself along the way—she created her business based on trail and error. She realized that she couldn’t wait around for permission to start a business; she had to take action and put in a lot of hustle. She knew to stay in business she would have to go out and make a name for herself so she attended networking events like crazy. That’s when she found the tiara and decided to take it to events as a way to break the ice with people. She was right—it got to a point where she walked into a room and people would call out, “Hi Princess!” 

I had to stop and ask—networking is hard enough as it is, how on earth did she find the willpower to walk into a room with a handful of business professionals while wearing a tiara? She said it wasn’t easy. From the moment she put the tiara on in her car to right before she walked into the room, she wondered what she was doing. Nevertheless, she pushed through the fear and the courage to be unique and stand out paid off—her business Seattle started to grow.

While Laurie has moved back to Lansing, the Princess of Persuasion hasn’t quite made the move. Laurie is still deciding whether to rebuild the Princess of Persuasion business in Lansing or look for a J.O.B. (how she refers to any position where her boss is anyone other than herself). She also wasn’t sure how the community would respond to a tiara-wearing newbie, so she decided to get a feel for the community first. 

There was one other thing stopping her. While she was good at her job copywriting, it wasn’t what she was truly passionate about doing. Laurie loves to get out and talk to people, not sit around and write. Her challenge is to decide what she’s truly passionate about and find a way to make money doing it. I’m in the same boat. I’m often asked what I want to do after graduation and, as much as I wish I had a straight answer to give, the truth is that I don’t know. I’m still trying to decide what I want to be “when I grow up”. 

I think I was happily naïve in thinking once I figured out what I want to do post-graduation I’d have my whole life figured out; but after talking with Laurie, I realized that the question—what do I want to do with my life—never goes away. Circumstances change; opportunities arise, interests wax and wane. My life is at a crossroads right now, and there’s a high probability that in 25 years, I’ll come to another (with a lot more thrown in along the way). However, what Laurie helped me realize is that while they are stressful sons of a gun, they also create opportunities to shake things up, get a change of scenery, meet new people, reevaluate what is, and is not, important.

I look forward to running into Laurie at one of Lansing’s many community events and hearing about what she’s up to—hopefully the next time we meet, we’ll both be a step or two closer to knowing what our next job might be. I have a feeling we will. Over the course of our coffee, Laurie’s story proved she was willing to take chances, to put herself out there, to work hard until she found what worked. As long as she packed up those skills and moved them to Michigan with her, she’ll find a fantastic J.O.B.—or successfully rebuild her freelance business here—doing what she loves.

I hope I can do the same.

Direct message via Twitter

me:

Hi Laurie, this is late notice, but do you have time for coffee sometime tomorrow or this weekend?

Laurie:

Perfect timing! I’m wide open tomorrow, and I’d love to meet for coffee. Just tell me when and where, and I’ll be there!

me:

Excellent! Do you live in Lansing or EL? If Lansing, how does Great Lakes Chocolate and Coffee at 1 pm sound?


Cup Four: Laurie Lonsdorf

Friday, August 6th / Great Lakes Chocolate and Coffee / 1:00 PM